Jane and her husband went out for dinner a couple of nights ago.
The First Baby Together
It was the first time by themselves after their baby was born. The baby is her second child, but the first for her husband. Having a child together was a big deal for them.
The Plan
They got a babysitter and decided to go to a very nice fancy restaurant.
An Unwelcome Patron
A few minutes after ordering, another couple sat on the table beside them with a small baby in a stroller.
At first, it was fine, but after a few minutes, the baby started crying.
Unsettled
The parents tried to comfort the baby; however, every time they managed to get the baby to sleep, it woke up crying again.
Another Table
After some time enduring the crying baby, they just wanted to leave. However, since they had already ordered, they decided to ask the waiter if they could change tables to the other side of the restaurant.
The Waiter Intervenes
The waiter asked if there was a problem. She explained that it was our first time out after having a baby, and they didn’t feel like spending the evening next to someone else’s crying baby.
He Understood
The waiter was very nice and understanding. He quickly asked another waiter to help him set up the new table for them.
Another couple that was in the same area also asked to be seated elsewhere.
She Overheard
Unfortunately, the couple with the baby overheard Jane speaking with the waiter.
“Babies Can Be Loud!”
The mom got upset and began offending Jane. She went on and on, saying that she probably doesn’t have kids and that babies are also people. She argued that Jane and her husband should just accept that babies can be loud and cry, and there’s nothing any parent can do about it.
Jane Didn’t Like Her Attitude
Jane didn’t want to start a fight but got very annoyed by her attitude. She replied to the woman that she could actually do something about the crying, arguing that she “could take her baby home so it could properly sleep and then let everyone else there enjoy their meals.”
A New Table
The woman continued to offend Jane, but she just ignored her. They went to their new table and, while they could still hear the baby crying, tried to have a nice dinner.
She Asked Her Sister
The next morning Jane explained the situation to her sister, and she said she agreed that Jane could have been a little more understanding.
She said Jane shouldn’t have told the waiter they wanted to move because of the baby, and she shouldn’t have said what she said to the mom.
Help!
After hearing her sister’s opinion on the matter, Jane felt confused. Was she in the wrong? She turned to an online forum to get opinions from others.
No Way!
One user said she did the right thing. “You have kids and got a babysitter. In what universe do you want to go to a fancy restaurant ANY time and listen to somebody else’s crying baby at the next table? No way.” Another user agreed and said that when eating at a fancy restaurant, there is an expectation to have a certain atmosphere, which generally does not include crying babies.
An Inconvenience
“If you had asked the waiter to have the other couple leave, then yes, you would have been in the wrong,” says one user. “Instead, you inconvenienced yourself and moved to a different table to enjoy your meal. Also, as a parent, I’d like to point out that there are places I will not take my small child to, as they do not yet have the social awareness and self-control to behave. Yes, they need to learn, and they can learn at less fancy places. I have turned down invites to activities because they were not at a child-friendly location, and I did not have childcare.”
The Parents Are To Blame
Another user argued that people with crying babies should get up and take them out of the dining room to settle them, even if that means returning to a cold plate. Many agreed, with another commenter adding, “That baby is not going to turn into any sort of respectable person if the parents have such little regard for anyone else or basic common courtesy.”
Just Leave
“If you can’t calm down your crying baby, I’m sorry, but you need to leave,” argues another user. “The baby isn’t enjoying themselves at that point any more than the parents or the other patrons. Maybe they are too warm, there are too many strange noises, sharp smells – it doesn’t really matter. Why put the baby and yourself through unnecessary stress? Ask for the food to-go, and one parent waits outside with the baby.
Think of the Servers!
Another user says, “I feel bad for the servers – they probably moved you into another person’s section, which makes things complicated for them.”